Feedback is not enough (says Gallup)

Great managers inspire independence and ownership in pursuit of high performance. That only comes through frequent, open-ended conversations where people feel like their honest opinions will be valued and respected.

This is the way to move forward, says Gallup.

Whilst few managers give feedback that is helpful to employees, managers who do give feedback  need to shift from past-focused feedback to future-oriented coaching, because great coaching conversations are a two-way street for true development.

Making Meaning is not the same as Making Sense

The brain remembers more effectively information and makes connections when an experience is meaningful, hence, when a given experience has clear relevance to a person's own life.  

In the same line, learning takes place either by connecting new information to old or by having a brand-new experience. And because new real-life experiences are sometimes hard to come by, making meaning through prior knowledge is easier.

As a leader and/ or people manager, it is important to understand that new employees and older ones are not able to connect on the same level because the new ones experience more novelty and finding ways to present meaningful information and to create meaning is key.

Making meaning and Making Sense don’t provide the same response.  If I tell you that I’m traveling from a town to another that is 2,5h away and that I am going to drive rather than fly, that will probably make sense to you - but is it meaningful?

Because the situation doesn’t concern you, you probably won't care that much to save it in memory because your brain works in different levels of understanding:

• Sense: Understood, but not relevant or necessary
• Meaning: Understood and related to something else you know
• Personal meaning: Understood and related to a personal experience

Making sense is how we exchange and gather knowledge about our world, how things work, how to use them, their purpose. Meaning making and seeking meaning however are inherently human processes at the heart of our humanity.

A good reading on this:
https://illuminateddandelion.com/2015/11/06/making-sense-or-making-meaning/

5 critical steps to fearless confrontation (or, How to Address the Elephant in the Room)

Regardless of people's reluctance to confront tough issues or challenging people, the fact is we need to. It is difficult to advance, succeed, or grow without confrontation. 

Engaging in productive confrontation paves the way for diversity of thought, developing healthy boundaries, arriving at new, innovative approaches, better decision-making, and challenging the status quo, all of which are essential if we want to thrive in our lives and work. The question is how can one make confrontations as productive, healthy and effective as possible? 

Here's a fine article from Forbes with 5 key strategies for facing confrontation not as aggressive or angry conflict, but as the act of facing something or someone that needs to be addressed head on – directly and proactively (also known as "the elephant in the  room").

More than intelligence needed for success in life

Research carried out at the University of Adelaide and the University of Bristol has examined long-held beliefs that success in school and careers is due to more than just high intelligence. Non-cognitive skills are also important.


The study, published in the journal Nature Human Behaviour is the first to systematically review the entire literature on effects of non-cognitive skills in children aged 12 or under, on later outcomes in their lives such as academic achievement, and cognitive and language ability.

"Traits such as attention, self-regulation, and perseverance in childhood have been investigated by psychologists, economists, and epidemiologists, and some have been shown to influence later life outcomes," says Professor John Lynch, School of Public Health, University of Adelaide and senior author of the study.

"There is a wide range of existing evidence under-pinning the role of non-cognitive skills and how they affect success in later life but it's far from consistent," he says.

To do nothing, except to accept

April, 4 - about 10 am; I am finally relaxing in vacations. Taking in deep breaths of pure air from the mountains covered with snow, somehow makes me feel even more thankful and joyful for the good life I have despite the less good things of the last years. "I am a lucky girl, so so lucky to be here, alive and enjoying" - might have been one of my thoughts when, sliding on the snow on a sunny morning, suddenly something scares me and makes me react. A strong and rapid twist to the right and the next microsecond I'm down. Damn!! What a bad (bad, bad!) falling... such an explosion of energy on the right knee... I automatically realize that something has gone wrong...

Fast forward; not as expected in initial prognosis, this is not an anterior cruciate ligament (ACL) rupture; this is a fracture of the tibial spine, an uncommon injury specially for adults, requiring an open reduction surgery with stainless steel wires to repair an avulsion fracture of the tibial spine eminence, the extension of the bone for attachment of muscles, involving the ACL insertion site.  

Yes, I have had pain in my life; but not this kind of pain. 

3 weeks in total immobilization with all-day deep pain, forced to be stopped, to stand still, to do nothing  - accepting there's nothing I can do, except to accept, to feel the pain. All of the pain. My mind elaborating deeper an deeper while reading and learning about recovery time. 

Pain and frustration. Feeling bewildered. It takes 5 weeks 'til I am able to use my yoga mat for some mindfulness to help me overcome these fellings.  I adhere to all instructions of my orthopedic doctor (Dr. Ricardo Antunes) and finally get release for total weight bearing after 8 weeks of surgery

4 months after the falling and week 10 after surgery;  back to one of my favorite running tracks where a simple 2km walk took me more than 30 minutes and amount and mix of feelings - from tears of pain to tears of contentment. 

Stay strong, life goes on. 

"Recovery is a game - pain resistance and endurance will support you."  - thank you Ricardo Paulino, for teaming with me.  

This kind of pain forced me to stop, to stand still, to accommodate pain without complaining. To wait, to be patient, to be resilient. To focus on springing back after bending. 

Surrounded by love and care, my anxieties have been listened and I have found a way of establishing a sense of self-worth and purpose without feeling depressed or angry. 

Yes, pain continues and is difficult still to think about  the long way ahead. 

Still, acceptance has become a way of being in my power - a way of being inside my strengths. 

#thestoryofabrokenknee#week14

All it takes is 10 mindful minutes

Mindfulness expert Andy Puddicombe, former Buddhist monk, is co-founded of Headspace, a project to make meditation more accessible to more people in their everyday lives. 

In this Ted Talk, Puddicombe refers the benefits of mindful thinking for healthy living and why is important to make meditation accessible to everybody: for a happier, healthier you.

Your silence serves no one

How do you see yourself? A typically cautious or an assertive person when it comes to stating opinions or speaking out about facts?

I am one of those who firmly believe that people deserve to know and hear the truth and so, a firm believer that silence serves no one when the intent is good. This applies from from saying to someone "there is a green thing in your teeth"  or to letting co-workers know about their inability to collaborate. 

However, in some cases, saying the truth or speaking out becomes a major challenge as we are humans who depend on relationships to survive -  choosing deliberately to speak out even when all the good intent is there, is not sufficient to assure that that it will return to your favour.

 

My choice has been based on the fact that I prefer to live with the consequences of speaking up rather than living with fear or in the shadow of the truth. So, while choosing to be courageous enough to speak out I continuously seek for ways of learning because the good intent can not only live in my mind; it is key that while 

Most of the times, your silence serves no one.

This is the message in this vivid TED Talk by Luvvie Ajayi (a Nigerian author, speaker, and digital strategist born in 1985) with remarkable take-away points about why one should seek to leave this world better than what is found and why choosing to effect change by speaking up can be a way to being the first and to provoke the "domino".